Jessica Abrams
Tox-ic
You might have days when you're driving down the highway with the sun at a distressingly high angle and, as the car slows due to traffic,...
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Jessica Abrams
Actress / Standup Comic / Writer
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Jessica Abrams
Oct 14, 20224 min read
Some Darkness
I called one of my best friends this morning: "I'm feeling like a complete loser and I want you to talk me out of it." It wasn't even...
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Jessica Abrams
Oct 2, 20223 min read
I Want A Boyfriend Who Cooks But I Don't Want Him To Be Snobby About It
I once had a boyfriend who made an excellent penne vodka with frozen langoustines from Trader Joe's, and he wouldn't shut up about it. He...
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Jessica Abrams
Aug 9, 20225 min read
Absolutely Too Fucking Fabulous
These days, watching television can make me suicidal. It used to provide escape from the pressures of life, television did; I could tune...
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Jessica Abrams
Jul 21, 20225 min read
Cooking with Julia
August, 2020. I wore two face masks and a head scarf wrapped not once but twice around the lower part of my face to buy oat milk at...
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Jessica Abrams
Apr 5, 20224 min read
In Search Of
I once knew a woman who claimed that before she met her husband, she made a two-page list of every quality she was looking for in a mate...
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Jessica Abrams
Jul 22, 20204 min read
I Am A Baker
I am a baker. There -- I said it. I resisted at first due to a checkered history with self-identifying bakers, those reed-thin women who...
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Jessica Abrams
Jul 14, 20204 min read
Tales of a Standup Comic: Bombing in Tucson
I'm sitting in the kitchen of the Airbnb I've called home for the last two nights. The shades are down and the air conditioning is...
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Jessica Abrams
Jul 14, 20204 min read
Food That Has Saved Me From Myself
A few years ago when I was visiting a friend in Paris, I went to more than one dinner party where the conversation went something like...
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Jessica Abrams
Jul 14, 20204 min read
I Want a Boyfriend But I'm Lazy
I once had a neighbor, an extremely tall nurse who liked to talk and had great style. Above all, she was organized, and it was enjoyable...
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Jessica Abrams
Jul 14, 20206 min read
How Does Anyone Get Married?
Last night in my acting class, as I was lamenting the shitty job I did on my scene and wondering whether it's still too late to get that...
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